Domestic Violence

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Domestic Violence

Tyniece, staff writer

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One out of every four women experience domestic violence. Most people don’t understand how a person can get stuck in the trap of domestic violence. Well it’s really easy to be a victim of domestic violence. You won’t know exactly if someone is the abuser, but here’ some information for people who are in a domestic violent relationship or people who do want to end up a victim.

Here are some the signs to look out for in an abuser, they tend to become quickly involved in whatever you’re doing, hyper sensitive, controlling, they try to isolate the victim as much as possible, they get jealous over everything, and they set unrealistic expectations for their partner to meet. There are also to look out for if you feel like someone is being abused such as, black eyes, red or purple markings on the neck, sprained or broken wrist, bruises, and chronically fatigue. Not all of the signs I’ve given may be visible but it’s just something to look out for.

People who are leaving or staying in a domestic violent relationship may develop mental illness, here are some of the mental illnesses people can develop, PTSD, depression, anxiety, OCD, schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder.

When in a violent relationship people become denial and act like they have no clue what you’re talking about. Some may fear the punishment they will face if they leave .They will make excuses for the way their partner acts or how they’re treated. Most people who stay in their relationships are because they have children and want to make it work for them, they may also think by staying it will keep the kids safe.

The road to recovery easy but here are some tips or advice. Tip number one, talk to someone you really trust because it will help with the healing process. Tip two, you have to believe in yourself. Tip number three, rebuild a support system and develop a safety plan. Your safety plan may look like this.

  1. Have important numbers for yourself/children to call (police, hotlines, friends, local shelter)
  2. Four place you could go if you decide to leave.
  3. Get a cellphone.
  4. Open a bank account or get a credit card.
  5. Figure out you’ll leave, practice it.
  6. Put a bag together of every day products and hide it to where it’s easy to access.
  7. Change the locks on the doors.
  8. Tell friends/ neighbors that your abuser has left and to call the police if they see him/her around the house or children.
  9. Make a list and tell the people taking care of your children who can and can’t pick up your children.
  10. Tell your boss what happen and give them a picture of the abuser, with instructions to call the police if they are seen at your job.
  11. Try to get everything under your name
  12. Change stores/business you used to go to when with the abuser.
  13. Go over you safety plan often.

Some items you should take, if possible:

  1. Children
  2. Extra clothes
  3. Money
  4. Medicine
  5. Keys to car, house, or work
  6. Important paper for yourself/kids (birth certificates, bankbooks ,credit cards, social security cards, driver’s license, school or medical paper, car registration, welfare identification, pass ports, green cards, and work permits)
  7. Lease/rental agreements
  8. Mortgage payments/unpaid bills
  9. Insurance papers
  10. Address book
  11. PPO papers
  12. Divorce papers
  13. Custody papers
  14. Thing of importance to you (pictures, jewelry, ect.)
  15. Items for kids (toys, blankets, ect.)

Here are a couple of hotlines you can call if you need someone to talk to, they’re both twenty-four hours a day:

National Numbers

1-800-799-7233

1-800-787-3224

Tessa shelter (Colorado Springs)

719-633-1462

Domestic Violence Response Team

719-444-7813

 

 

 

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